Poison

            

            “Leeeee! Lee!” Keiran shrieked, bounding up onto their bed from his shower, still soaked and naked. Lee gave him a look – one that was clearly concerned as to what he had done with his towel – and Keiran hiccupped and grasped Lee’s shirtsleeves. “Leopold! You hafta fix me, Lee!” he claimed, shaking his older lover.

            Lee made a face, about to ask why when Keiran collapsed back onto the bed with a loud, very exaggerated wail.

            “LEE! I’m /dying/! I’m dying Lee and I fear there’s nothing you can do about it! You’ll never want to be with me again!” Lee offered a conciliatory thigh-rub and Keiran melted into a whining, squirming puddle.

            “Care to tell me what’s wrong?” Lee asked him softly.

            Keiran wailed dramatically, looking up at him from hooded eyes. “Leeeeee. Lee, I have a horrible, itchy rash, Lee. On my bum, Lee! And on my thighs!” he wailed, reluctantly parting his legs so Lee could examine him.

            “I bet its herpes, Leopold. Isn’t it? Its herpes. Or Chlamydia. Oh my God, Lee. I have Chlamydia! My life is over. I bet I gave it to you, too. I’m so disgusting. I knew I shouldn’t have sat on the toilet at that place the other night, Lee.”

            Lee laughed despite himself and Keiran whined, shifting up and away, kicking out at him. “Yeah, you’re real fucking funny, Lee. Laughing at my misfortune. At least you have a home and a dog and money. I have to go live on the streets now and nobody will ever touch me again. I hate you. I hope you have it, too, Leopold, because you’re a jerk!”

            Lee grinned and caught his lover’s foot, tugging on it hard enough to tip Keiran back down into the sheets. He crawled up on top of him, effectively pinning him with his weight as he kissed him. “Stop it, you goof,” he purred.

            Keiran looked at him dejectedly. Lee kissed his nose, running gentle fingers down his sides. “Keiran, baby. Its not herpes or Chlamydia,” he promised. Keiran looked a little relieved.

            “What is it then, Lee?” he asked him. What could be /worse/?

            Lee grinned. “Keiran, do you remember yesterday? In the woods…hiking. And you thought the picnic spot we chose was perfect for fooling around?” he said. Keiran nodded at the memory.

            Lee laughed softly. “Yeah, not so perfect, kiddo. That lovely rash of yours? Poison Ivy.”