Stupid Lee [and stupid Keiran]

Lee was walking ahead of me. He was limping slightly—stupid rugby injury—yet he was still walking faster than I was. Stupid long legs. He glanced over his shoulder at me, motioning me to catch up to him, smiling. Stupid smile. I hurried to catch up with him, though, knowing he wouldn’t appreciate me lagging behind. Although when he tried to catch my hand, I pulled away and woudn’t let him.

Stupid Lee.

He’d been /stupid/ all morning.

It started when I wouldn’t get up with the alarm. Who in their right mind gets up at 7:30 anyways? Ridiculous. He hauled me out of bed, forced me to shower, eat and get ready for school, and although I was /super/ good all morning, he wasn’t very nice. And then he hauled me off to school and when I disagreed with him about his methods when he was walking me to class, he took me aside and threatened a spanking! So unfair!

Then, when I was off for lunch, he told me he couldn’t get off work and come eat with me. We /always/ eat lunch together when I have class. He said there was a lot of stuff he had to do, and although I tried to be patient and understanding, he brushed me off and said he had to go, and he’d be there to pick me up. Again, so unfair!

Then, THEN, to top it all off, he picked me up and when I very reasonably told him how I felt about the whole day, in no way being disrespectful or rude or anything of the sort, he told me he would spank me if I continued, and that we were going to do groceries. That was the freakin’ icing on the cake. GROCERIES? Gah!

So, that’s where I am now, doing groceries with stupid Lee. And he’s /still/ trying to hold my hand.

“Alright, Keir. If you don’t want to be with me, go and get some milk and eggs then. And pick out some yogurt that you’ll eat. I’ll be in the bread section.”

Good, he gave up. I made a face at him, sticking my tongue out at him as I stormed away. I heard him mutter something about tantrums in public and that I knew the consequences, but I ignored him.

I passed a chocolate bar stand on the way to the coolers—a new kind of 3 Musketeers, Lee’s and my favourite—and I smirked, thinking I knew how to get back in his good graces. I grabbed milk and eggs and picked out raspberry yogurt before I circled back and grabbed two of the chocolate bars. When I found Lee, he had nearly half of the groceries finished and he gave me a smile when he saw me.

“I need fruits and vegetables and something snack-food-like,” he told me. I nodded, setting the food in the cart and when he spotted the chocolate, an eyebrow rose marginally in my direction.

“What’s that, Keir?” he asked me, and I smirked.

I shrugged. “Just chocolate, Lee,” I told him, fully expecting him to move the cart onwards. He didn’t.

“Go put them back, we don’t need any chocolate now, Keir. We’ve got candy and junk food galore at home that you have yet to eat.” I made a face at him and shook my head, crossing my arms over my chest and standing my ground. This wasn’t merely for /my/ benefit. They were Lee’s favourite, too.

“But Lee, they’re /new/,” I informed him, to which he took a step closer to me. I stepped back, laughing to myself. “They’re /mint/, Lee. They’re your favourite.” He didn’t look convinced.

            “They are limited edition and what if they get rid of them before we can try them, Lee! And look, the packaging is all green! That’s your favourite colour,” I tried to reason. Lee’s fingers tightened on the cart handle. I tried to think fast.

            “Uhm, Lee? What if we get in a car accident on the way home and then we never get to try them, /ever/? I’ll pay for them!” Lee shook his head still and took the bars from the cart, handing them to me. “Put them back, please,” and I glared, turning to return the stupid things.

I stopped on my way…I had my wallet. I could buy myself one, eat it while in the store and he’d be none the wiser. Not my fault if stupid Lee missed out on this amazing new invention. I made a beeline for the cash with one of the bars. It took no time at all to pay for it and I slipped it into my coat pocket as I made my way back to Lee, planning on sneaking to the bathroom to eat it as soon as I could.

I don’t think I was being obvious about it at all. Lee, however, seemed to sense I was holding out on him. God, he’s /such/ a freak! He’s got like x-ray vision or something. Or like that guy in ‘What Women Want’…he can read my mind! Scary, I know. But as soon as I walked up, he gave me a strange look.

“What else do you want me to get?” I asked, feigning innocence. He shook his head. “I’m going to look at the meat section for a bit, see if I can pick out some chicken for us,” he said, and I nodded.

“Alright, then I’m gonna go pee!” I announced loudly, and sneered at an old lady who looked at me, affronted. Lee was already headed to the meat counter so I just skipped off to the bathroom.

I locked the door behind me and started on the bar. It was amazing! Lee was /so/ missing out. He didn’t even know how bad he was missing out. I was eating it slowly, wanting to savour it—well, if Lee wasn’t going to let me buy one and they discontinued it, I wanted to have this memory. I had about three quarters of it left and I heard a knock at the door. I jumped. “It’s occupied!” I said around a bite.

It was Lee who answered. “I know. I thought you just had to pee?” he asked. My eyes widened and I looked at the chocolate bar in my hand. “I did. B-but…now I need to do more than that?” I said uncertainly.

            “Hurry up, brat. I’m done; we can get out of here and get home,” he said and I bit my lip. “Okay, I’ll be out in a minute!” I replied, shoving the rest of the bar in my mouth, chewing quickly. I flushed the toilet and turned the sink on to make it seem like I had been in there for a reason. Lee was lingering, I could /feel/ it. I swallowed, feeling sick for lying and buying the bar but also because it was rather disgusting trying to eat pretty much a whole bar in under a minute. I rinsed my mouth out and finally, composed, left the bathroom.

“Ready to go?” he asked me, and I nodded, moaning as I allowed him to take my hand this time. My stomach hurt. He hooked me close, taking me to the check out counters. I could tell he knew something was up, but I wasn’t about to confess. By the time we had paid and gotten out to the car, the mixture of chocolate and guilt was making my stomach do flips and by the time we got home, I wanted nothing more than to curl up on the couch.

Lee made me help put groceries away. He noticed how slow I was moving and he touched my back. I jumped away from him. “Lee, can I go lie down a bit? My stomach hurts,” I whined. He looked at me, but he nodded.

“I guess you don’t want one of these, then?” he asked, and pulled out a mint 3 Musketeers. I almost threw up then, but I made it to the bathroom in time. He followed, concerned.

I collapsed into his open arms when he’d flushed the toilet and moaned. He hugged me. “Hey now, what’s wrong, bunny rabbit?” he asked and I looked up at him pleadingly. He scooped me closer and I clung to him, tears staining his shirtfront.

“I ate one already!” I wailed, and he ran circles up and down my back. “I-in the store. I bought one and, and, and…I ate it in the b-bathroom!” I thought he’d be upset, but he only scooped me up into his arms and stood, moving me from the dirty bathroom floor to our bedroom. I curled up into him, still crying.

“Why aren’t you mad?” I asked, worried. He shook his head.

“I think you’ve learned your lesson, kiddo. You managed to make yourself sick over it, which is a feat in itself knowing you and puking. I think that might be punishment enough. Of course, I’m not happy that you hid it from me and deceived me, but I think you’re paying for it now. Maybe we’ll write some lines, later, hm?” I frowned, but nodded.

I had expected much worse. A spanking, at the very least. He usually paddled me for lying…but lines? Ugh, how I hated lines! I felt him kiss the top of my head and I sighed, snuggling closer to him.

“I’m sorry,” I murmured. He swatted my butt and crawled out of bed.

“Tell me later,” he said. “Two hundred times.”

Stupid Lee!